Mia Says She Had Threesome With Peter Thomas’ GF

This week’s title of the Real Housewives of Potomac is “Showtime!” There will be a dull live show with awkward glitches, but Jacqueline and Mia will provide a sexy sideshow on how to dance around questions about their relationship. Let us watch the dance-off, shall we?

I must forewarn you all that the show starts off as another snoozer, but it picks up by the end, so bear with me. Karen finally visits Gizelle’s house, and she does not have to trudge through the dirt to get to a tent in the driveway. She also gets full bathroom access this time! Karen compliments Gizelle on her fierce design, but in her ITM, my queen Karen will only give a shout-out to her chandelier. Karen does give Angel and Adore Gucci bracelets for their birthday, which was awesome. Gizelle loves that Karen is so good to her girls. I did note how happy the girls seemed when they saw Karen, and I found that to be really sweet.

Karen shares with Gizelle that her live show will be like cocktails and dinner inside a Bloomingdale’s. She will have a Q&A and some sizzling topics for her audience. Gizelle is not following any of this, but she seems to just nod at the right moments like she is keeping up. She is so fortunate that she is a beautiful woman who loves to stir the pot, or she would not have much going for her.

Gizelle is salivating to spill some tea with Karen about Mia and Jacqueline’s friendship. Karen does not think there is anything untoward about them showering together. She attributes it to exhibitionists who want to share their goodies with the world. Gizelle shares that she also asked Mia about the closeness of her relationship with Jacqueline. She ponders what is really behind Mia’s inference about Jacqueline’s Porsche and Gordon making the purchase. Maybe trade a p*ssy for a Porsche?

Wendy is in the hospital with Eddie, and she is trying to pass a huge kidney stone. She woke up Eddie in the early morning hours when she was in pain. Wendy (who is bizarrely in full makeup coming from the hospital) and Eddie arrive home after her outpatient surgeries. Wendy’s mom Susan tries to get her to take care of herself since she has kids that need her. Susan is still asking Wendy for new boobs since they dragged her boobs through the mud when they breastfed. Side note: Anyone who breastfed can relate to that dilemma, but I have never asked my daughter to foot the bill.

Ashley is home with her sweet boys and her nanny, Daisy. She shares that Michael is still looking for a house for her and the boys. Ashley is a first-time homebuyer, but she is still depending on the dusty old troll to finance it. She should be behaving like a first-time buyer and buy it herself. Ashley is now moving on with Luke from Summer House. I do not believe she has moved from her penthouse in the sky yet, so another bullsh*t storyline to add to the divorce.

Robyn and Gizelle arrive at the set for their live show at a 400-person theater. They have not sold tickets and do not have any sponsors. Robyn and Gizelle have invested $10k already in this venture. They will be incorporating Juan into their repertoire. Gizelle asks about the wedding, which she is not invited to. She is pushing for a date just to help Robyn have a storyline this season in case they need her for anything.

Candiace is crunching away trying to firm up what she thinks is flab, but she is already super tight. She does need to get rid of that pink “My Little Pony” wig from her ITM, though. Candiace is shooting her Insecure video with Trina, and she now has a $25k budget to work with. She thanks Trina for shooting the video in the rain, and it is much better quality. Candiace does not want to end up like the other Housewives who tried to make it in the music business. Side Note: Did anyone see Chris at the shoot??? In the last episode, he was not even inside the house when Candiace thanked everyone for their support while obtaining her MBA.

Robyn tells Juan that everyone is after her for a wedding date. Juan says it is up to her, and she needs to pick a date. Robyn talks to Juan about adding an infidelity clause in their prenup. Juan bobs and weaves around that question like the true baller he is. Robyn wants to avoid a messy situation, so why is she friends with Gizelle then? Juan insists he has no ill intentions, and she should just trust him and ignore that he has a blonde side-piece.

Karen visits Mia, who is pretending to be the queen of domesticity. She wants to know about the shared showers and boyfriends. Mia states, “I have done, like, weird promiscuous things.”  She and Jacqueline did not kiss, but they have fondled each other. Mia wanted to be a gynecologist, so she decided to play doctor to look for her cervix. Karen, of course, assumes it must have been a childlike incident, but she finds out they did it when they were 19! She then finds out that Peter got Mia and G.’s sloppy seconds after they were done with her. Sorry, I must clutch my pearls after this scene!

Robyn and Gizelle are having their first live Reasonably Shady show. Charrisse (who always looks so disheveled), Ashley, Mia, and Karen arrive to watch the show. Karen cannot believe that Juan showed up, and she notes that there are a lot of empty seats. Karen Huger Zone (KHZ) pulls a Robyn and decides to film the room to show the venue is empty. Candiace is not coming since Gizelle is not worthy of any support.

The host does not know their names and appears to be intoxicated. Robyn’s mic is not working either but that should not affect the show. Karen is in the audience taking notes on what not to do when she does her live show. Juan is brought up front, and he’s asked if vacuuming in the morning when the night owl (Robyn) is still sleeping is shady or reasonable. He makes a great point when he asks them to define morning. Robyn also gets questioned about the wedding date by an audience member, and she tells her to stay tuned. Ashley is now brought up for an awkward dancing segment, which clearly shows how desperate this show is to add entertainment. Robyn claims she and Gizelle profited $14k from their show.  Candiace needs to let them know that revenue minus expenses equals net profit.

After the show finally ends, Gizelle corners Jacqueline to find out if she was asked to sleep with Mia and Gordon. She suggests they ask Mia about it. Gizelle wants to know why Mia says Jacqueline is winning because she is her friend and drives a Porsche. Jacqueline does the “wobble” around this question, and she acts like she has earned her own coins.  She wants them to direct these questions to Mia.

Mia sits down and admits to watching Gordon have sex with other women. She will slurp on her champagne in the corner while they do the nasty. Mia starts swaying to the left and right, and she’s doing a much better job of doing the “Dougie” than Ashley was! She sure knows how to avoid answering a question.

Gizelle asks Jacqueline again about sleeping with Gordon. Jacqueline is not attracted to him but to his wallet. She insists that Gordon is not for her, but she will still not answer if she would sleep with him if she were attracted to him. Gizelle then asks, “Like how many showers do you have to take to get a car?” I was on the edge of my seat to find out the answer to that question! The topic is then tabled since Mia and Jacqueline are dancing around the question, but Gizelle is confident there is more to it…

Next episode, Karen gets her chance to do her show, and Mia heckles her during it. Candiace is confronted with Ashley’s friend, who she calls a Sesame Street character?!? Happy holidays, Blurbers, and I will see you all back in Potomac for the New Year!

TELL US —  THOUGHTS ON THE LATEST RHOP EPISODE?